“There is a time for everything,
and a season for every activity under the heavens:
a time to be born and a time to die,
a time to plant and a time to uproot,
a time to kill and a time to heal,
a time to tear down and a time to build,
a time to weep and a time to laugh,
a time to mourn and a time to dance,
a time to scatter stones and a time to gather them,
a time to embrace and a time to refrain from embracing,
a time to search and a time to give up,
a time to keep and a time to throw away,
a time to tear and a time to mend,
a time to be silent and a time to speak,
a time to love and a time to hate,
a time for war and a time for peace.” –Ecclesiastes 3:1-8
You would think that living in seven states in the course of our marriage would have prepared me for the most significant transition to ever come my way: that of launching our children and experiencing the joy of seeing them begin to make their own way in the world.
However, having poured so much of my love, attention, and time into those children, the realization that this job is coming to an end can feel like a very rude awakening. As I look around me, I see many of my fellow moms look up in disbelief as their “nests” begin to empty, and wonder, “What next?”
We cry even as we rejoice over the beautiful gift of seeing the fruits of our labors as our youngsters make their first tentative steps into the adult world. We share their triumphs, we agonize over their challenges and missteps, and we know they are making progress toward becoming the adults God has intended for each of them to be.
Yet, what about us? What do I do with these hands so accustomed to wiping away tears, preparing meals for six, holding little hands, or clasping bigger ones? What do I do with these feet, so used to chasing after toddlers, jumping up at high school sporting events, or running to the car to go pick up the carpool? What use is there for my words, so long used to soothe hurt feelings, offer advice, or lecture misguided offspring.
Recognizing there is a time and season for everything means that I can accept that this season of life may include a time of grief as I look back fondly on the precious years of full-time mothering. Entwined with that grief is the joy of knowing that I have done this job to the best of my ability…but God is not finished with me yet! This season may bring some pain, but accompanying that pain is joy in seeing my precious children follow God’s plans for their own lives, and seeking His guidance for the tasks He has yet in store for me.
“All the days ordained for me were written in your book
before one of them came to be.” -Psalm 139:16
Lord, may I take comfort in the assurance that You had a plan for my life before I ever took my first breath. Walk with me through this time of grief and remind me of the joys yet ahead as I seek to walk with You. Amen.
Kristen, you have so beautifully expressed the heart of a mother. There are so many different seasons of parenthood and we can scarcely be prepared for all the changes they bring. God is our anchor!
I pray that someday, when my kids have all left the nest, they will yet cherish their mother and the love I will forever give them. Of course, above all else, I pray that they will cherish HIM and love Him more than anything! I personally value my relationship with my mom now more than ever and I’m so grateful for the way she has poured into my life.
God sees us, and you’re so right, He is not finished with us and still has more work for us to do! Thanks for this post. I look forward to more. :o)
Thank you for your kind words, sweet friend! We are both so fortunate to have parents who continue to pour into us and set such wonderful examples. Love you!